The Secret Relationship
by Maiko Itsumademo
Summary: A one-shot about what happen's when Lavi reads Shounen-ai. Contains Yullen and I guess traces of LavixLenalee...so if you don't like those pairings, you probably won't like this fanfic...


**You have no idea just how much fun I had writing this, I love you Lavi 3**

**Disclaimer: I do not own -man**

"_Hiroki, we mustn't, its forbidden love!"_

"_I don't care what they think Ohjiro! I love you!" With that declaration of pure love, Hiroki wrapped his arms around Ohjiro and…_

"This…" Lavi murmured, eyes fixed on the beautiful writings of passionate love between two men "this is…" he looked up, a smile on his face "this is brilliant!!" he yelled. He turned to the final page and tears welled up in his eyes "no Hiroki!" he yelled "how could you choose that horrible woman, Misaki, over Ohjiro!? The one you truly love!" reading the last line he breathed a sigh of relief "I knew you would make the right choice in the end, Hiroki!"

"Shut up you stupid kid!" yelled bookman appearing out of nowhere to kick Lavi in the face. Instead of his usual retaliation however, Lavi stood up, wiping tears from his eyes, threw down the book and yelled "YOU COULD NEVER UNDERSTAND PANDA!" with that he ran from the room. Bookman picked up the book Lavi had left behind "…oh dear god" he muttered.

Lavi ran out and looked over the balcony "maybe Lenalee or Miranda would understand the beautiful-" he stopped as he caught sight of something, and couldn't look away. Allen and Kanda were across from him, staring at each other angrily. "I-if they stare at each other for over five seconds…" Lavi whispered, counting down "4…3…2…1…that's it! It's a rule! They must be a couple!" he pulled out a camera that was conveniently small enough to fit in his pocket and snapped a picture of the two. The flash alerted them that something was up and turned towards him. "What the hell do you think you're doing, baka usagi?!" Kanda yelled

"Lavi…why did you just take a picture of me and Kanda?" Allen asked

"N-no reason!" Lavi said

"Well then could you erase it? I don't like being in pictures very much…" Allen said

"Um…actually…I'm writing a newspaper!" Lavi yelled

"A newspaper?" Kanda and Allen said at the same time

"They spoke at the same time!" Lavi squealed, too quiet for them to hear, then he said "yeah um, Komui asked me to write a newspaper about what goes on at the order…for um…the other branches to read…so I need at least one picture of every exorcist, and they should be candid shots, so the one I got of you two staring at each other lov- uh with malice! Yeah that's perfect…I have to find Lenalee and Miranda now…bye…" with that he turned around and ran back down the hall where he came from leaving Allen and Kanda to wonder what he was really up to.

* * *

"You think Allen and Kanda are in love?!" Lenalee yelled. A couple of finders looked up from where they were eating to give Lenalee incredulous looks. "Shh!" Lavi said "and of course they are! Just watch them next time you see them!"

"I mean…I can see where the theory would come from, but does the rule about a look lasting over five seconds really work in real life?" Lavi took out his camera to show her the picture he had taken "can you argue with photographic evidence?"

"W-well they certainly LOOK cute together…" Lenalee muttered, blushing a bit "b-but…I don't know…the whole thing seems fishy to me!"

Just then Allen and Kanda walked into the dining hall "Shh! There they are!" Lavi said "ok watch them. And I'd like to point out they walked in together"

"Y-you're right!!" Lenalee gasped "why is that?!"

"SHH!"

Allen and Kanda walked over to where Jerry was making food, a couple of finders snickered at them, Kanda gave them a death glare. "aw" whispered a finder "he's embarrassed!"

"WHAT DID YOU SAY?!" Kanda yelled

"shoot he heard me…" said the finder "well I guess this is my last day here…"

Kanda put a hand on his sword, but before he could activate his innocence, Allen put a hand on his shoulder "just let it go Kanda"

"O-oh my god!" Lenalee whispered "they really are!"

Allen turned at the sound of her voice and saw that she and Lavi were staring at him, crouched behind a table. "W-what are you two doing…?" Allen asked. They stood up quickly "hahaha! Nothing!" Lavi said

"Did we look suspicious to you?" Lenalee laughed "you must be having an off day Allen-kun! C-come on Lavi…we have to go…work on the newspaper" she pushed him out of the dining hall blushing.

"Maybe there really is a newspaper…" Allen murmured.

* * *

"So…" Lenalee said "now that we know about Allen and Kanda's…secret relationship…what do we do?"

"Write fanfiction about them of course!" Lavi said, pulling out a pen and paper

"EH? Are you serious? What if they find it…K-Kanda will kill us!"

"Lenalee…for the sake of the fanfiction…it's a risk I'm willing to take"

"O-ok!" Lenalee said, and intense look on her face "I'll help you!"

* * *

"I-I can't believe this!" Lenalee said, reading over their 'work' as they walked through the hall.

"Yeah…now I'm even a little scared of what will happen if Kanda finds this…" Suddenly, because of their failure to watch where they were going, they crashed into someone and fell over, scattering the fanfiction on the ground.

"Sorry!" Allen said, picking up the papers "I didn't see you guys, I was talking to Kanda!"

"H-he was talking to Kanda…" they murmured

"What?" he asked, picking up the last paper. Suddenly, Lavi and Lenalee noticed what Allen had just picked up off the ground. "AH! Allen-kun! That's the newspaper you have to give it back to us it isn't finished!!!"

"Eh?" Allen said "well can I read it, I'd like to know what you guys wrote about…" he started to look at the paper

"NO!!!" Lavi yelled "Allen you can't look at it yet!!!!" too late. Allen's face turned bright red "Y-you guys wrote th-this…?" he said, holding it out to them with a trembling hand "a-about me…and K-Kanda?"

"What?" Kanda said, snatching the paper away from Allen, he looked at the first page.

"Ah…NOOOOO!!!!!" Yelled Lavi and Lenalee at the same time "were going to die!!"

"Uh…" Kanda started "this…" he glanced at Allen and then they looked away from each other. "C-could it be?" Lenalee started

"A-are we going to witness a confession?!" asked Lavi. Then the moment dissolved as little red 'angry signs' appeared on Allen and Kanda's foreheads. "You know what I want to eat for dinner tonight, Moyashi?" Kanda said "Boiled rabbit"

"That sounds pretty good" Allen said "maybe we could stick Lenalee in the pot too" Kanda pulled out his sword. Allen's arm transformed. "INNOCENCE, ACTIVATE!"

**I'll leave the rest to your imagination. Btw, two hours later Kanda and Allen made out in the corner.**


End file.
